Breakups sting and there’s no sugarcoating it. They’re one of the hardest emotional experiences to go through, and they can leave us feeling lost, empty, and questioning everything. 

 

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Entering a relationship feels like heaven where we create many unforgettable memories with them. But, sometimes we lose these bonds and decide to go separate ways. Research backs this up: a 2023 study by Emerging Adulthood found that over a third (36.7 per cent) of American adults went through a breakup in just one year. Also, men and women experience hurt at different levels. On average, women take the breakup harder at first, but they also tend to recover more fully and emerge emotionally stronger.
 

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Men, on the other hand, don’t necessarily "get over it". According to Craig Morris, a research associate at Binghamton University, this difference comes down to biology. Women have more at stake when choosing a partner, so when a relationship ends, the emotional toll is greater. But because of this, they also process, heal, and grow from the experience. Meanwhile, men may push forward without fully dealing with the emotional fallout, carrying unresolved feelings with them long-term.

Because a breakup isn’t just about losing a person; it’s about losing a part of your world. Your relationship gave your life structure, meaning, and even a sense of identity. When that’s taken away, it can feel like a piece of you is missing, like there’s a hole inside you that nothing can fill. Suddenly, everything seems meaningless, and even day-to-day life can feel like a blur. To figure out the best way to deal with this rollercoaster of emotions, we reached out to Dr. Shreya Chakravarty, psychologist and deputy manager of UR.Life Life Studios, Hyderabad to know how to move on from a relationship. 

Related story: Signs of A Toxic Relationship

 

6 Tips to Move On from A Relationship From A Mental Health Expert

Breakups can shake you to your core. You’re not just losing a person; you’re losing the future you imagined with them. Feelings of anxiety, depression, and even a deep sense of personal loss can follow up, especially if attachment insecurities are in the mix. 

Here's how to bounce back to normal life:

 

1. What’s the best way to emotionally detach after a breakup?
 

Dr. Chakravarty: The first thing to do is to create distance emotionally and physically. With all your willpower, avoid the urge to text at any point in the day, check social media, or accidental run-ins. Your brain needs time to rewire itself without them at the centre of your world. But you should also keep in mind that detaching isn’t just about cutting contact. It’s also about shifting your focus back to you. Reconnect with old hobbies, pour into your friendships, and remind yourself that your identity existed before them.

 

Related story: How to Breakup With A Toxic Friend

 

2. How can someone work through guilt or regret when a relationship ends?
 

Dr. Chakravarty: It’s easy to replay every moment and wonder if you could’ve done things differently. But here’s the truth: regret is a tricky emotion that makes you believe you had more control than you did. Instead of lingering on ‘why me?,’ ask yourself, what's the blessing behind this separation, or how can I be a better person next time? 
Then, let it go. You did the best you could with what you knew at the time. Be kind to yourself.

 

3. What are some healthy ways to cope without social media stalking or shutting down emotionally?

Dr. Chakravarty: It’s normal to feel like stalking your ex’s social media accounts to know what they are up to. But, this is not a healthy thing to do, it is directly affecting your mental health and may reignite hope of reconciliation. Every post you see is a fresh stab to the heart. Mute, unfollow, block if needed. Out of sight, out of mind works wonders. Hang out with your friends, family, or alone to cafes, movies, or anywhere you feel like going. Have the courage to resist thinking about your ex and invest yourself in something productive like gardening, painting, cooking, etc. Fall in love with your life again. 

 

Related story: How to Build Trust in a Long-distance Relationship

 

4. How can someone rebuild their self-confidence after a toxic relationship?

Dr. Chakravarty: Toxic relationships can take away your self-worth, but it's time to reclaim your power. Remember who you were before those influences entered your life. Reflect on what you loved and what brought you joy. Reconnect with those passions and interests. Affirm yourself every day and stand strong in your beliefs with statements like, ‘I am enough. I am worthy of love. I deserve happiness.’ Embrace this practice; it truly works. Start to prioritise yourself to get out of the toxic memories from the previous relationship. Travelling alone is something most women do to get a new perspective on life, meditate for inner peace, and most importantly, focus on your personal growth and profession. 

 

5. How important is closure in moving on, and what can someone do if they never get it?

Dr. Chakravarty: Closure is a good idea to end a relationship or even get validation from the other person, but it’s not always essential. Sometimes, we may not receive the apology, explanation, or farewell that we believe we deserve. And that’s perfectly fine. Closure is something you need for yourself and it’s something you think you need. It’s about acknowledging the past and finding peace within it. You don't need others' words to move on; what matters is your decision to take that step forward with confidence.

6. When is the right time to start dating again?

Dr. Chakravarty: There’s no fixed timeline for this, but if you’re dating just to fill a void, I think it’s too soon. Healing isn’t about waiting for a perfect moment when you feel completely okay. I would suggest waiting for the right time when you are completely over your past and have decided to give your life another try. When you can enter the dating scene without desperation, that’s when you know you’re ready.

 

Related story: How to resolve Conflicts in Relationships

Right now, it might feel like the pain will last forever. It is understandable that breakups are tough, but they’re also an opportunity for growth, self-discovery, and transformation. The key is to allow yourself to feel, learn, and rebuild. Do not rush the process.You are not defined by this relationship, and you are certainly not broken. One day, you’ll look back and realise this heartbreak wasn’t an ending.

 

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