Life wouldn’t be nearly as interesting, exciting or emotional without friends along for the ride. Even as we forge new connections and embrace the experiences that life offers, the depth of the bond we share with our old friends remains etched in our hearts. No matter how many new friends you make, the essence of old friendships lingers, quietly reminding us of the shared laughter, support, and moments of understanding that shaped who we are.

 

We all cherish fond memories of an old friend. Be it their unique habits, or the joy of getting together, or chatting and laughing around them. But whether it’s the passage of time, the struggles of distance or clashing personalities growing up, friends can drift apart for many reasons.

 

A 2024 study by the Simon Fraser University found that people are as hesitant to reach out to an old friend as much as they are to start a conversation with a stranger, even when they have the capacity and desire to do so.

 

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“We share a life narrative with people from our past,” explains psychiatrist Gail Saltz, M.D., associate professor of psychiatry at the New York-Presbyterian Hospital and Weill Cornell School of Medicine and host of the podcast, How Can I Help? She also mentioned that reconnected friends can quickly recapture much of the trust they previously built while offering each other a dash of novelty drawn from whatever they’ve been up to in the meantime.

 

Related story: How To Be More Mindful In Friendship

 

How to Rekindle with Old Friends?

The best way to reconnect is not by sliding into their DMs with a simple hey, or calling over the phone, although these might be good ways to start. Meeting in person — for a meal, a drink or coffee— is the way to go. There’s something about seeing them, and them seeing you, that elevates the catch-up to a special level. It’s about laughing over old times and what you can’t remember (or prefer not to remember), sharing secrets, holding back tears and talking through the challenges you’ve faced over the years.

 

However, If making a phone call or planning a meet-up feels daunting, consider dropping a text message. Responding to one of their recent posts on social media is a great way to start a conversation about what they're currently involved in. Take your time to gradually nurture the relationship in a manner that feels comfortable and organic to you.

 

Another good way to break the ice is by starting the conversation by reminiscing about a cherished memory or a humorous moment you shared. This will transport both of you back to when you were close, making the exchange more natural and easing into the typical "What are you up to now?" discussions that can sometimes feel awkward.

 

Related story: The Perks of Spending Time With Your Family And Friends

 

Is Reconnecting with Old Friends Worthy?

According to a 2023 study published by the University of Kansas, just one quality conversation with a friend during the day makes you happier and less stressed by day's end.

 

Not only this but there are many more reasons to rekindle a lost healthy relationship. A few of them are listed below.

 

Revisit Your Childhood

Gathering with old friends brings back a sense of youthfulness. Memories flood our minds, letting us relive those warm moments. Nostalgia is lovely. It recalls our past happiness and wonder. If you need a reason to reconnect with old friends, let it be the joy it brings to your smile.

 

Research by the Wall Street Journal shows that psychological distress often causes nostalgia. People tend to experience this sentimental longing for the past when they are feeling sad, lonely, anxious or disconnected, or when life feels meaningless or uncertain.

 

Nostalgia increases positive mood, self-esteem and self-confidence, according to the same study. It makes us feel more socially connected and optimistic. It helps us feel that life has more meaning. It’s highly motivating, pushing us to pursue goals, reconnect with people who were once important to us, and make new relationships.

 

Connect with Your Past Self

Rekindling friendships from earlier times can help us reconnect with different parts of ourselves. Old friends can remind us of the person we used to be and help get us in touch with parts of ourselves that might have become suppressed over the years.

 

It is like rediscovering lost pieces of ourselves. They can bring back memories and traits we may have forgotten or buried. It's a chance to embrace our past selves and integrate them into who we are today, creating a richer and more authentic sense of self-awareness.

 

Gain New Perspective

Reconnecting with old friends can give us a new perspective on our lives now relative to the past. We can also get a perspective on the past from someone who has been through it with us. Through their eyes, we may uncover forgotten details or gain insights into how those past events shaped who we are today.

 

Moreover, revisiting the past with a friend can remind us of our growth. This allows us to appreciate the distance we've travelled and the lessons we've learned.

 

Related story: How To Revive Your Friendships

 

Rediscover Yourself 

Reconnecting with old friends is like rediscovering where you came from. It lets you reminisce and understand how it shaped you. These are the people who can rewind time with you, who can remember how far you’ve come. 

 

Reassessment of Priorities

 

Conversations with old friends may prompt us to reevaluate our goals and priorities, leading to positive changes and realisations. Conversations with old friends serve as a reality check. Their insights and observations can shed light on aspects of our lives that may have been overlooked or neglected, prompting us to realign our focus and take meaningful action.

 

Furthermore, reconnecting with old friends can reignite passions and aspirations that may have faded over time, inspiring us to pursue new endeavours and embrace change with renewed enthusiasm.

 

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As we navigate life's journey, these enduring connections serve as anchors, guiding us towards growth, self-discovery, and a deeper appreciation of our past, present, and future. So, take the leap and reach out to those old friends—rediscover the joy of shared laughter, the comfort of shared experiences, and the invaluable support of lifelong bonds.