Mental Health
How to Spot Silent Patriarchy
Patriarchy may have stood the test of time, but it doesn't need to stand in your way. From microaggressions to traditional gender roles, uncover the subtle forms of patriarchy that still linger in our society and learn to spot and challenge them.

A Pew survey shows that 80 per cent of Indians believe women should have the same rights as men, with little gender difference in this view. While 55% think gender doesn't affect political leadership, only 25 per cent believe men are better leaders. However, attitudes shift when it comes to employment, as 80 per cent of Indians feel men should have priority for jobs when opportunities are limited, reflecting lower female labor force participation.
The reason so many Indian women have resonated with Mrs. film is because it mirrors their own lives, where they too carry the weight of trauma passed down through generations of women. It’s a cycle that seems unbreakable, a pattern of emotional pain and suffering that feels inevitable.
Mrs. (2024) is a film that touches on themes of gender, identity, and power dynamics, specifically exploring silent patriarchy. Silent patriarchy refers to the subtle, often unnoticed ways in which patriarchal structures and gender inequalities are perpetuated in society.
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5 Ways To Spot Silent Patriarchy
1. Subtle Gender Expectations in Professional and Personal Spaces
Silent patriarchy often works through the unspoken societal rules that place women in specific roles, especially in the workplace or at home. In Mrs., the protagonist might encounter moments where her worth is implicitly tied to her looks, demeanor, or relational status, rather than her intelligence or abilities.
Example from the movie: A scene where the protagonist gets overlooked for a professional opportunity, not because of her qualifications but because she is expected to fulfill a more "traditional" role at home, such as managing the family and fulfilling their needs. This might be subtly suggested by family members who uphold these gender norms without realising it.
How to spot it: Look for instances where women are implicitly judged or limited in their professional or personal roles based on gendered expectations that are not explicitly discussed but are understood and reinforced by others.
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2. The "Invisible" Labour Women Are Expected to Perform
In Mrs., the protagonist could be shown doing emotional or caregiving labour that goes unacknowledged by the people around her. This could include managing family events, handling emotional work, or supporting others without any recognition or support.
Example from the movie: In the movie, the protagonist is seen grinding chutney on a stone, a task that may seem simple but is imbued with cultural and symbolic significance. The act of grinding chutney traditionally requires time, effort, and patience, as it's done by hand using a stone grinder (or sil batta), rather than with the convenience of modern kitchen appliances like a mixer.
How to spot it: When women are expected to take on more emotional responsibility without it being acknowledged as valuable or important. This often happens without anyone directly saying it, and it becomes normalised over time.
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3. Dismissal of Women's Voices and Opinions
Silent patriarchy is also present when women’s voices, ideas, or contributions are subtly dismissed or ignored in favour of men's. This could be at the workplace, within relationships, or in family settings where women’s input is undervalued.
Example from the movie: The protagonist expresses her desire to pursue a personal dream—participating in a dance competition. However, she faces opposition from those around her, particularly family members, who expect her to prioritise family obligations over her own aspirations. The decision to dismiss her personal ambition and relegate her to fulfilling the dreams and needs of others (typically male members of the family or the broader familial expectations) showcases a powerful example of how women's voices and ambitions are subtly undervalued.
How to spot it: Look for moments where women’s contributions are minimised or dismissed without overt hostility, simply because the group culture or dynamic privileges male voices. It may not always be intentional, but the effect is still to marginalise women.
Related story: The Feelings Mothers Are Agraid to Voice-Anger, Shame, Guilt
4. Normalisation of Gender Inequality
In many cases, silent patriarchy is so ingrained in the culture of a workplace, family, or social environment that it’s accepted as "just the way things are." The protagonist might be shown navigating this reality, where her complaints or desires for change are seen as "unreasonable" or "too much."
Example from the movie: A moment where the protagonist challenges the status quo—whether it’s in her personal relationships is met with either quiet resistance or the suggestion that she is being overly sensitive. This could be a conversation where a male character explains to her that she "shouldn’t make things more complicated," reinforcing the idea that women should quietly accept inequality.
How to spot it: When women voice concerns about inequality or power dynamics and are subtly told that these issues are not worth discussing, or when their desire for change is framed as unnecessary.
Related story: How to Foster Gender Parity
5. Implicit Bias in How Women Are Viewed
Silent patriarchy is also maintained through biases that shape how people perceive women, often leading to assumptions about their capabilities or intentions based on their gender. In Mrs., the protagonist might be judged more for her appearance, emotional state, or relationship status than for her abilities or ideas.
How to spot it: When a woman is judged or treated differently based on gendered stereotypes, especially when she is expected to behave in a certain way (e.g., be nurturing or passive) and faces negative consequences when she deviates from those norms.
Challenging Silent Patriarchy
The power of the patriarchy may be silent, but it's not invincible. You can combat it by speaking up in the face of sexist comments or assumptions, challenging traditional gender roles and stereotypes in your daily interactions, and advocating for equal treatment and opportunities. Remember, every step you take to call out patriarchy contributes to the greater fight for gender equality. Your voice has the power to shake up this ingrained system, so use it proudly and unapologetically.
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