Mental Health

What Not To Do This Diwali

Planning to make Diwali 2022 the best one yet? Let nothing get in your way, not even yourself. Here’s how to navigate Diwali without becoming infamous for all the wrong things this year.

By URLife Team

20 Oct 2022

If you’ve watched Never Have I Ever, chances are that you can vividly recall Devi falling into a swimming pool at a party and not living it down the next day. Diwali may be a time of joy and celebration but spending all this time with friends and family can come with its own baggage. If you’re prone to getting in sticky situations more often than not, it’s best to know which situations to avoid beforehand, or what you should do if you’re confronted with something unexpected.

This festive season, do away with the old, and transform into a new and better version of yourself. As a bonus you avoid becoming the social pariah of the year when you avoid doing these things:

What Not To Do This Diwali

1. No Fights = No Stress

While disappointment and disagreements are an intrinsic part of any relationship, do you really need all that stress on Diwali? Conflict can hinder your festive vibes, so it’s best to stay away from any fights you feel brewing up. If you feel like there are specific people who will trigger you, it might be better to stick to general niceties (like greeting them) and then move away from the conversation.

If you feel like a fight could potentially begin if you keep talking about a specific topic, steer the conversation away to a lighter topic.

2. Reconnecting with Frenemies

Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘You shouldn’t drink poison just because you’re thirsty?’ Getting back in touch with toxic people is something like that. It won’t just make you unhappy today, but lead to overthinking tomorrow too. Save yourself from the pain and heartache and actively avoid those who don't see your worth.

3. Apparent Re-Gifting

Look, we’ve all been there! Re-gifting is the easiest way to hand off unwanted presents to someone else, but it might be better to look to wider pastures when you’re doing it. Instead of making the mistake of regifting within the same social circle, keep a list of who’s gotten what. You obviously don’t want everyone to know that you are regifting!

4. Indulging In Politics

Diwali is a time for fun, so do you really need to ruin the atmosphere by getting into political conversations? Politics tends to bring out intense emotions, which can include rage and frustration. Sometimes, it might be better to agree to disagree.

5. Suffering Through An Unpleasant Evening

If you’re not feeling the vibe at a party you’ve been invited to, it’s okay to exit the situation. Don’t stay in situations or with people who don’t let you feel your best self, because this is a time for you to enjoy yourself! It can be mentally and emotionally draining to be stuck in unpleasant situations, triggering anxiety, fatigue and stress. Draw boundaries with people and situations that don’t benefit you in any way.

6. Oversharing at Parties

Sad break-up stories and secrets are the last thing you want to hear or share at a party. Everyone is there to enjoy themselves, and oversharing can ruin that sometimes.

Oversharing can stem from not having a confidant to talk to, having a lot of stress, or because there’s nothing significant to talk about. But telling someone all the details about your personal relationships can cause more problems than it's worth, and lead to anxiety for you later too. Think about some conversation starters that can prevent you from oversharing, and it can include easy topics like favourite books, music, plans for the festive season and so on. You should know which topics to avoid, and it can help when you’re thinking of conversation starters you can use with anybody.

7. Showcasing Culinary Wizardry

You might be excited about Diwali, we get it! But, is this the best time for you to be re-creating new dishes? The results (or consequences) might be something that you don’t expect, and when a dinner is ruined, little can save it. Trying to recreate new dishes is not only time-consuming but can be extremely stressful. It’s better to be safe than sorry, so stick to dishes you know you’re a pro at.

Related story: Making Veg Shrikhand With Vinita

8. Going Above and Beyond

Whether you’re planning an event or buying gifts, it’s crucial to know that your bank balance is limited. Spending like there’s no tomorrow during Diwali (whether it’s for a harmless card game or gifts) is never a good idea. Set a budget to prevent the heartbreak of an empty wallet after Diwali.

9. Being The Last to Leave

This is probably the first festive blowout without any social restrictions, so who can blame you for staying as long as possible? But, all good things must come to an end. Don’t be that person who is the last one to leave the party only after the host has to forcibly kick you out. Channel your inner schoolchild, avoid notoriety and leave with the others!

10. Being the ‘Gossip Monger’

It might be tempting to delve into all the drama in someone else’s life, but you really don’t need that bad karma. While norms around shaming have changed over time, it’s still very much present in social circles, and it can take a toll on everyone’s mental health.

Both the gossiper and the subject of the gossip are scrutinised, and this can lead to feelings of anxiety, stress and shame for those involved. Think twice before indulging in unnecessary gossip that can lead to misunderstandings, heartache and much more.

Related story: How to Stop Sabotaging Yourself

11. ‘Phubbing’

It’s the age of technology and social media, but there is definitely a time and place for using your phone. Scrolling through your phone during a social event, a.k.a ‘phubbing’ can impact your social life and relationships. Friends and family may think that your phone is more interesting and valuable to you than relationships, and it can set a bad precedent for you.

Try to actively avoid using your phone while you’re at an event by either putting it on silent or airplane mode. If you’re hosting an event, you might want to ask everyone to check in their phones in a common area from where they can pick them back up as they’re leaving.

12. Hijacking the Music

Hijacking the music at someone else’s event is never a good move, and can land you in trouble. The host/DJ can feel offended, and asking for permission is always the best way to approach playing your own music. Remember to clarify with the host and ask politely.